Alan Greenspan Died of What???

Sometimes even the gloomier headlines land a little funny. Take the latest one about former Fed Chairman Alan Greenspan, who passed away on June 22nd.

"Alan Greenspan, former Fed Reserve chair dies, with cause of death revealed."

"Cause of death revealed"—as if we were all waiting for some shocking twist. The article goes on to say he died from complications of Parkinson's disease. Sure. But honestly, every disease kills you through "complications." If diseases had a job description, that would be it.

Rule #1: Complicate one's ability to continue living.

By their very nature, complications are the part that actually does you in. Heart disease? One of the complications is that your heart stops. COPD or emphysema? A key complication is that you stop breathing. It's not exactly a mystery.

The part, in this case, that matters more is the fact that Alan Greenspan was 100 years old. Parkinson's or not, few people are cracking triple digits and making a run into overtime. At that age you could trip over a throw pillow and that would be your "cause of death revealed."

We already knew he had Parkinson's. We also knew he was a very old man. So, his passing isn't shocking, and it certainly doesn't require a dramatic headline tease.

Perhaps if someone had never heard of Alan Greenspan, the headline might be more informative. It's certainly a headline worthy of someone much younger who suddenly dies. When that happens, out of pure curiosity, we want to know.

A cleaner and more honest headline would have been: "Alan Greenspan, former Fed Reserve chair, dies at 100."

Then, inside the article, mention the Parkinson's diagnosis, and trust readers to connect the dots. He was a centenarian with a serious illness, and eventually biology does was biology does. 

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© 2026 Jim Bauer

Trump on a $250 Bill? Seriously?

Only in America could the idea of putting President Donald Trump on a brand-new $250 bill turn into a national meltdown before lunch. The man could cure cancer, and someone would still find a way to be offended. That's just the political climate we're living in.

And before anyone assumes, "Well, of course Springboard loves this idea, he's one of those MAGA guys"—pump the brakes. If you've followed me for any amount of time, you know I don't rubber-stamp ideas just because they come from someone I generally support.

So, let me be clear. I think the idea is dumb. Not dangerous. Not world-ending. Just unnecessary.

There's a long-standing rule—codified in 1866—that we don't put living people on U.S. currency. It came after Spencer Clark, then Superintendent of the National Currency Bureau, put his own face on a 5-cent note. Congress was furious, the public was furious, and Representative Thayer argued that honoring living individuals on currency undermined the dignity of the nation. He was right then, and he's still right now.

Now, Trump isn't against the idea. Of course he isn't. He likes putting his mark on things, and there's nothing unusual about that. Plenty of wealthy and influential people do the same. But this wasn't his idea to begin with. It came from Congressman Joe Wilson of South Carolina, and 13 Republicans cosigned it.

Honestly? They shouldn't have. Not because it's immoral, but because it's tone-deaf and politically pointless.

Should Trump oppose it? I think so. Not because he's unworthy, but because it hands critics an easy talking point. It adds fuel to a fire that doesn't need more gasoline. And beyond that—it just feels tacky.

If we want a $250 bill to celebrate America's 250th birthday, I'm all for it. I'd happily add one to my collection of interesting notes. But do we even need a person on it? Why not feature the signers of the Declaration of Independence? Why not choose something that honors the country instead of turning it into another culture-war chew toy?

Wilson and the cosponsors should have known this would look bad. Trump should know it doesn't look good. And the whole thing becomes yet another distraction—another shiny object for the media and the haters to obsess over instead of focusing on anything meaningful.

Changing the law wouldn't end the world. Most Americans will never even see a $250 bill. It would be a novelty, a collector's item, a conversation piece.

But big national milestones deserve something better. Something that reflects our history, not our divisions. Something that honors the country, not the chaos.

We have a chance to create a piece of currency that celebrates 250 years of America. We don't need to turn it into another political circus. Honor the country. Make the bill. Make it historic. And leave the culture-war out of it.

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© 2026 Jim Bauer